(If you missed our post on how to improve the communication inside your relationship, you can read it: here.)
1. They are active listeners.
- We already mentioned that good communication depends on active listening. The good listeners are active listeners. They don’t allow other things to take away their attention (for example: their mobile phone, TV, or other people) while they are talking with someone. They put everything down and focus on the person in front of them, so the other person knows that they have an interest in what they have to say.
- While someone else is talking, the good listeners don't interrupt, talking over them or finish their sentences for them.
- They wait and watch for nonverbal communication, like gestures, facial expressions and eye - movements. The good listeners don’t just listen with their ears, but also with their eyes. They watch and pick up the additional information being transmitted via non-verbal communication.
2. They show empathy.
- The good listeners empathize with the person they are speaking with. They try to put themselves in the other person’s shoes. That helps them to see the situation from the perspective of the person who is talking with them.
3. They encourage the speaker with their body language.
- They are nodding with their head, looking straight into the other person eyes. They turn their body toward the speaker.
4. They ask appropriate follow-up questions to draw out more information.
5. They don’t say things like: “It’s not the end of the world” or “You will feel better tomorrow”.
6. They validate other people’s feelings (for example: “That sounds like a really hard situation”; “It’s normal to feel like…”). It shows that what they are saying makes sense.
7. The good listeners don’t try to help immediately. They first focus on absorbing everything what the other person is saying to them and only after they try to help.
8. They try to create a safe and pleasant atmosphere where the other person will feel encouraged to speak with them.
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